There is hope for us overthinkers
I am a certified overthinker.
For as long as I can remember, my mother has been annoyed by my overthinking. “Stop thinking too much,” she’d say.
What can I say? My brain is wired this way. Still, I know keeping myself grounded and in the present benefits me.
If you are a fellow overthinker, here are six books that’ll help you manage it.
Surf the waves!
The author defines overthinking as when thinking starts to hurt. Her aim is to help readers catch themselves in the act of overthinking before the pain kicks in.
I certainly remember the dark times in my life when my head would hurt due to overthinking. I used to think that if I could just ponder on something enough, I could solve it.
We all know that isn’t possible.
“A great way to get out of your head is to inject playfulness in your thinking
Arthur teaches us to ride the wave of anxiety (hormone wave) instead of controlling it.
She tells us to celebrate once it passes.
Overthinkers get stuck in their head more often, triggering these hormone waves. The author tells us to identify our triggers. What causes us to become all sweaty and dizzy?
Once the triggers have been identified, come up with a catchphrase. The author’s phrase is “protect the head.”
She uses it to stop herself from spiraling.
“Color, like music, can have an immediate grounding impact on thoughts. It draws us away from our racing mind and into the physical reality of the moment.”
Another important part is getting to know yourself. One way is to write 3 pages in the morning. Write whatever comes to your mind.
The author also introduces the concept of energy budget and energy debt. Just like money, everyone has a different amount of energy in their bank. So spend accordingly!
“Remember mental health is a ‘Get the oxygen mask on yourself first, then help others’ situation.”
This book is an engaging and informational guide to handle the thoughts that overwhelm your brain.
Buy Get Out of My Head: Inspiration for Overthinkers in an Anxious World by Meredith Arthur On Amazon
Change your thoughts, change your life.
There is a famous saying, ‘You are what you eat’.
How about ‘You are what you think’? It is exactly what Darius Foroux tells us in this book.
“You become what you think about all day long.”
He tells us that the quality of our thoughts determines the quality of our lives.
Through this premise, the author discusses how we can think straight in uncertain times and make better decisions.
An important part of thinking straight is to not think about the things that you cannot control. Instead, think only about the things that you can make a difference in.
Every day, we receive so much information. But most of it is noise. We need to filter it out and keep only the information that will help us.
“Money is a replaceable resource. When you’re out of it, you can earn it back. You can’t say the same for time. Don’t spend too much time thinking about money.”
Furoux warns us about the biases that taint our decisions. He also reminds us to put our assumptions aside and to engage objectively with the facts.
“I noticed that many smart and happy people kept journals. They also reflected more on their life.”
Whenever something happens, we react instantly. These reactions are based on impulse. But when we allow our minds to relax and analyze, we understand the situation better.
This book will teach you how to think straight in the noise of a fish market.
Defeat fear and climb the dragon of purpose.
The book is divided into three parts:
Inner warfare
Control
Purpose
Fear is natural. But it is also an obstacle in our path. We have to fight and overcome the fear inside us.
“Life is always unpredictable. You can’t change this process, but what you can do is manage your inner battles first then the external.”
The author calls fear an illusion that distracts us and puts self-doubt in our minds.
Another important piece of advice from Foroux is to keep learning from every situation.
He also tells us to build our confidence and competence in order to defeat fear.
“Don’t let fear spread toxic within you.”
Like other books in today’s list, this one also argues for being present in the moment.
The author tells us to free our minds from thoughts of the past and future.
Controlling our minds is important. Otherwise, the thoughts will take over.
Just like Victor E. Frankl, Darius Foroux tells the reader to find purpose in life. He explains that the answer to the question of purpose is unique to everyone’s life.
“When you are aware of your wants, your goals, and the ways which will let you achieve your dreams, at that point you win your life.”
This book will teach you how to create peace inside yourself.
Buy Win Your Inner Battles: Defeat The Enemy Within and Live With Purpose by Darius Foroux On Amazon
Learn the art of calmness from a monk.
Haemin Sunim is a Buddhist teacher and writer from South Korea. Well-versed in Buddhist tradition, Sunim teaches us the art of slowing down.
We all complain about the noise in today’s world. The constant emails, messages, posts, and updates are screwing with us.
The author invites us to know our minds.
“We know the world only through the window of our mind. When our mind is noisy, the world is as well. And when our mind is peaceful, the world is, too.”
Perhaps, it is possible to find calm in the middle of the storm.
And to find that we need to become self-aware. Awareness means bringing our attention to the present.
But what about XYZ?
Our mind keeps jumping from the past to the future. To contain it, the author suggests dumping everything in writing and then going for a good night’s sleep.
The book is part anecdotal, part Buddhist wisdom, and part compilation of insightful sayings.
The author tells us about the clash between consciousness and subconsciousness. In order to connect with our subconscious, he tells us to meditate.
“Our consciousness often does not know what our subconscious wants. We think we want something, but when we get it, we realize we wanted something else.”
The book also touches on the importance of religious tolerance. Despite being a Buddhist, Sunim shares how passages from the Bible inspire him. He also shares his experience of visiting a Christian community in rural France.
“Just as my faith is precious and significant to me, wouldn’t it be the same for people of other faiths?”
I must say, I am pleasantly surprised at the breadth of the topics that this book covers.
From a calm mind to respecting other traditions, it sure has a lot of ground covered.
A root cause analysis of overthinking.
Nick Trenton connects the cause (anxiety) to its effect (overthinking).
In order to battle the demon of overthinking, we need to deal with its root, which is anxiety. Anxiety can be dealt with in a variety of ways.
The author tells us to log our stress levels. He also tells us about the 4 A technique for stress management.
The 4 As are avoid, alter, accept, and adapt. You can deal with stress by avoiding a situation, altering it, accepting it, or making changes in yourself to adapt better to it.
“The present moment is where life truly unfolds. By anchoring yourself in the here and now, you let go of the burdens of the past and the worries of the future, finding peace within.”
The author recommends many practical steps for us to bring awareness to our bodies and minds instead of being stuck in a loop of negative thoughts.
Those include journaling, maintaining a log of stress levels, and narrative therapy.
Another thing that causes stress is the lack of time management. The lesson in this book is about making the most of the time and energy that we have. A backlog of to-dos makes us anxious and brings us down.
If we do better in our time management, we are bound to improve our stress levels and anxiety.
We also learn about the importance of CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) and relaxation.
The author gives us three different techniques for relaxation. These include:
Autogenic relaxation
Progressive muscle relaxation
Visualization
This book is packed with practical tips to calm an overthinking mind.
Childhood experiences make your brain.
Sometimes the thoughts of our past haunt us. That interferes with our ability to have a healthy and objective outlook on life.
We become shackled to our traumatic experiences.
This book is all about understanding and dealing with that.
Oprah Winfrey, a famous American talk show host has teamed up with Dr Bruce D.
Perry, a psychiatrist. Both have an acquaintance spanning 3 decades. This book is set out in the form of conversations between the two of them.
“The experiences in the first years of life are disproportionately powerful in shaping how your brain organizes.”
Did you know that Oprah Winfrey was abused as a child?
It included physical abuse, sexual abuse, and abandonment. Her experiences as a child pushed her to understand and explore childhood trauma.
We learn in the book that experiences in the early childhood years have a very high impact on how our brain develops. The authors reframe the question from ‘What’s wrong with you?’ to ‘What happened to you?’
“What I’ve learned from talking to so many victims of traumatic events, abuse, or neglect is that after absorbing these painful experiences, the child begins to ache.”
Therapy is not about undoing what’s been done to you. Rather, it is about building healthier and newer pathways.
Interestingly traditional healing used to be done through the following:
1) Connecting with community and nature
2) Rhythms like songs and dance
3) Beliefs and stories
4) Rare use of natural hallucinogens
The new ways of trauma treatments are the versions of these traditional paths.
“Our major finding is that your history of relational health — your connectedness to family, community, and culture — is more predictive of your mental health than your history of adversity.”
The most important thing is having a healthy relationship with your people. And this acts as a very important part of balancing the effects of hard times.
This book gives us tools to manage the pain of the past and toward a brighter future.
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If you enjoyed these book recommendations, check out the rest of my book lists on my blog- https://www.thenovelnest.com/blog
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